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I'll keep digging through it, but there's a lot there and I'd like some suggestions to narrow my search. Again, though the evolving times may have brought about a relaxation in this rule, it is still followed by many youngsters. Would she be okay with never being married in the temple.
LDS theology heavily promotes the idea that marriage and family are an important source of happiness in this life, not just the next. The only thing I can say is good luck to all. If you do manage to break her away from the church, her family will be there to continue sowing doubt. She is considered "an old maid" by Mormon standards, so she may be willing to marry you--hoping you will convert someday --but she will constantly be reminded that your marriage is inferior to the "Eternal Families" of sealed Mormons, and she will fear dying and never seeing her loved ones again. No complaints whatsoever though GF or BF and spouses of physicians quickly understand that medicine isn't a profession Many times you will be second. Sadly, the general consensus of "convert or nope out" sounds like what will end up happening. I find that having zero expectations, single parenting and having my own life makes our marriage work well. I've had friends with spouses that got Fulbrights or grants to study in other countries. I don't want a life of paranoia and loneliness but she is the person I want to be with and I want to ask her the most important question of my life this summer. Needless to say, my life is a little bit crazy.